{"id":2245,"date":"2021-05-19T12:35:00","date_gmt":"2021-05-19T12:35:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/preprod.realtrends.com\/blog\/2021\/05\/19\/leaders-are-you-really-listening-to-your-team-members\/"},"modified":"2025-03-13T02:37:39","modified_gmt":"2025-03-13T02:37:39","slug":"leaders-are-you-really-listening-to-your-team-members","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/preprod.realtrends.com\/blog\/2021\/05\/19\/leaders-are-you-really-listening-to-your-team-members\/","title":{"rendered":"Leaders, are you really listening to your team members?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Remember as a child learning \u201cStop, Drop and Roll\u201d? This is how to react if there\u2019s a fire. What do you do when one of your team members approaches you to talk? Do you \u201cStop, Focus and Listen\u201d? And, I mean active listening \u2013 being present, attentive, engaged, open-minded and non-judgmental?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A <a href=\"https:\/\/preprod.realtrends.com\/blog\/develop-or-replace-a-brokerage-team-leader\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">CEO I coach<\/a> was concerned about the feedback he received in a recent employee engagement survey. There were several negative comments about his communications skills. He was surprised because he has always encouraged people to talk openly with him. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What he discovered is that they didn\u2019t believe he was actively listening to them. Some of the comments were: &#8216;You\u2019re always distracted and multi-tasking when I try to speak to you,&#8217; &#8216;You constantly look at your phone while I\u2019m speaking,&#8217; &#8216;You interrupt me before I\u2019m finished sharing my idea, so you obviously don\u2019t care what I have to say.&#8217; This was a huge wake-up call. He&#8217;s now working on his active listening skills. He gives his full attention, asks open-ended questions, shows emotion to what he\u2019s hearing and periodically clarifies to ensure he\u2019s clearly understanding the message.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The best leaders know that leading with active listening is a crucial skill and the foundation for building relationships with their team. It shows empathy and caring, but when you\u2019re not actively listening, what message does it send? It tells your team members, \u201cYou aren\u2019t important to me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here are 5 immediate actions you can take to tune-up your active listening skill:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\" type=\"1\"><li><strong>Increase your listening-to-speaking ratio.<\/strong> What\u2019s yours? Be honest with yourself. Are you interrupting the person before they\u2019re even done talking because you\u2019ve already formulated your reply? Are you finishing their sentence for them? 70% listening to 30% speaking?<\/li><li><strong>Do not listen autobiographically! <\/strong>In Stephen Covey\u2019s book, <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.franklincovey.com\/the-7-habits\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People,<\/a> <\/em>he defines this as the listener who hijacks the&nbsp; conversation to tell their own story. Yes, it might be a shared experience, but this is not about YOU. Focus on them and listen to truly understand what they\u2019re saying. Once I learned there was a name for this, I was shocked at how many people are guilty of listening autobiographically.<\/li><li><strong>Listen with your head and your heart. <\/strong>Showing empathy as a leader is a sign of strength. When team members really know that they\u2019re being heard, they are more apt to provide honest feedback. It reinforces the culture of trust within your company, and they will feel valued as an individual.<\/li><li><strong>Open your mind, not just your ears. <\/strong>Listening without judgment is crucial for leaders. You will not grow complacent and embracing new ideas shows you are a learner and adaptable to change. The Dalai Lama said it so clearly, \u201cWhen you speak, you repeat what you know. When you listen, you learn something new.\u201d<\/li><li><strong>Stay in the moment. <\/strong>Always show respect, be present and give your undivided attention. You can do this by minimizing distractions (cell phone, shutting down email on your computer), keeping focused eye contact and summarizing what they\u2019ve told you. For example, \u201cI understand your frustration, and I\u2019ll get back to you by tomorrow with several options on how to correct the situation\u201d.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p>Active Listening takes practice, but the payoff is huge because your team members will recognize it immediately. \u201cStop Focus Listen!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.jillbelconis.com\/meet-jill\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Jill Belconis<\/a>&nbsp;<em>is a strategic business coach and RealTrends contributor.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you \u201cStop, Focus and Listen\u201d? And, I mean active listening \u2013 being present, attentive, engaged, open-minded and non-judgmental?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":15802,"featured_media":4822,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3255],"tags":[],"coauthors":[450],"class_list":["post-2245","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-archive"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.4 (Yoast SEO v26.8) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Leaders, are you really listening to your team members? - RealTrends - Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Do you \u201cStop, Focus and Listen\u201d? 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